how to harness beginnings as kick-starts for our goals?
There is this thing with us humans and new beginnings. We feel much more motivated to do something when it is just right at the beginning of something. Cough new year Cough.
Even though it is not a sickness, but something that impulses us, it still limits us if we choose to not start at the beginning of the year.
I think we forget that there is also a beginning of the month, week, and day if we choose to go by the division of the Gregorian calendar.
I could blow your existential little existence on this earth away by reminding you that it’s all invented, but that doesn’t change that there is a sort of psychological impulse at the beginning of things.
And since that is probably not going to change, I am here to talk to you about alternate new beginnings. New opportunities that you can use to impulse yourself to start that new habit, that you promised you were going to start January first, but you never did because that day you were too hangover from that new year’s eve party.
Disclaimer: this doesn’t mean that you can let yourself be dragged by the idea that there is always a new beginning as an excuse for not starting today.
The Now method
There are phrases like “Every day is a new beginning,” “If not now, when,” “There is no better time, than now,” “the future starts today,” e.t.c. You get the idea, any let’s do it! phrases that you can stick on a pillow and use as decor. I think even Nike’s slogan can enter this category.
These kinds of phrases can be an impulse to “just do it!” that can work for a few people, but many people need the incentive of a new beginning.
If you are not one of those people needing that incentive,
here is your pep talk:
If you didn’t start a month ago because it was a new beginning, how can you assure yourself that you are going to start next month. What if that goal began now? The next step is now. Within the next hour, do something that drives you towards your goal. If your goal is to start painting, buy some brushes and paint. Set up a space. Set yourself up for success before you even have to start, so that when that next minute of the hour comes, you overcome that mountain and you put brush to canvas.
This is a hard method. The now method requires a will-power and very little overthinking (which is very hard in these times).
This is about following the impulse that doesn’t exist. For example, I wrote this blog a month before you are reading it. I was supposed to write it two weeks ago (aka a month and a half before you are seeing it). And to be honest, I could just have written it down, 1 day before posting. This was a habit that I wanted to change and I had to overcome myself right now, open my laptop and just start typing whatever came into my head, to later be shaped into a concrete post.
If I would’ve thought about it, gave it a second of thought, it would’ve been 3 times more painful to write the first sentence.
So if the now method is for you, maybe stop consuming and start creating (unless your goal was to consume some sort of content).
And hey! You are here, which means you are already setting yourself up for success.
The new beginning method
For when the now method doesn’t work, for those of us who need a bit more of an impulse, this is it. Just letting you know that the now method is technically going to come into play when you get to the first day of the month, or to Monday. Because in reality there is nothing really stopping you from starting next month or next Monday. So maybe go back and give that a read if you didn’t.
Now for as how to use new beginnings as a mini trampoline.
1. Decide the date
Find a date that looks like a start date for you. That could be the beginning of the month, your birthday, halfway through the month, e.t.c. There are really a ton of new beginnings you can use. I will give you a list down below so you can use it.
- January 1st- Gregorian Calendar new year
- January 22nd- Start of the Lunar year, start alongside the moon
- 20th of March- Start of spring, also beginning of astrological year
- 1st of April- Kha b’ Nissan, also celebrating the start of spring and rebirth of nature in the Assyrian calendar
- 12th of September- Enkutatash, Ethiopian new year. Also known as the “gift of jewels”
- Your Birthday!
- The start of each quarter of the year (January 1st, April 1st, July 1st, October 1st).
A lot of calendars (alternate to the Gregorian one) use spring as their new year dates and the “fresh start” days are mostly during the first half of the year. Author Daniel H. Pink studied the science of perfect timings. If you are interested in this topic, his book “When” explores it and he gives 86 days to get a fresh start.
2. Schedule this day
Make it so that there are no excuses. Make as much space for what you have to do so that other things don’t take the time of this goal you have. So if someone asks you what you have to do in like February 1st, you can say, “I am busy.” No explanations needed.
3. Set yourself up for success
What do you need to have to do this thing you want to do? Want to start going to the gym (super inventive example)? Then maybe get some workout clothes, a resistance band, whatever you think you will need to fulfill your goal.
Motivators
This is the step where things that look pretty motivate us. Who hasn’t bought a new water bottle because you think it will motivate you to drink water, cause I have 🙋♀️. Not everyone is motivated by something like this, but if you want to find more about types of motivation, check out this podcast by Chelsea Riffe. She’s amazing.
4. Make it a ritual
If you have to light up three candles and set an intention, then that is what you must do.
Create a space for yourself in which you feel welcome and unjudged for what you are about to do. A lot of times what stops us from getting to our goals is thinking about what others will think of us. Maybe for you that looks more like a routine.
Will dunking head in cold water give you the adrenaline you need to jump into your preferred method of transport and go to that meeting? If yes, then do it.
If you have to shout affirmations at the mirror to put your workout clothes on and go to the gym, then do it.
*I feel like I have to say to make sure that your ritual is loving and encouraging, but if you need to threaten yourself every once in a while the
n, you do you.
5. Stop freaking thinking and go
Literally, stand up, and go. No more thinking from now until you do physically start doing the thing. Wanted to meditate every day. Plop yourself down and click play and close your eyes. No ruminating.
Tell yourself about your habit
Now that I have told you how can you do it, let’s ask ourselves some questions about our new habit to motivate us a bit more.
- Why did you decide you should start this habit? What benefits will it bring you internally?
- What mental shift will happen when you work towards this goal of yours?
- How will that mental shift impact the rest of your goals and what you’re working towards?
- How will your mentality look like after 4 months when the start of this goal snowballs into other aspects of your life?
- How will that reflect on your reality and your day-to-day life?
This sort of visualizing that we are doing over here will give you a lot more encouragement to take one, or both, of the strategies above and start the habits that lead to the goals that you have been striving for with a bit more impulse.
If there is anyone who can do it, it’s you.
